You MIGHT be a DOOFUS if.....

Discussion in 'Ham Radio Discussions' started by W3SY, Mar 2, 2004.

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  1. KY5U

    KY5U Premium Subscriber QRZ Page

    </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">5rr (with my additions)
    You're also a Doofus when:

    1.  You complain at the microwave for taking so long when nuking something for 30 seconds.
    1a. It catches fire because it was not a microwave but a toaster oven.
    2.  You walk up to an elevator (going up) whose light is lit and you punch the button again.
    2a. Then you punch it every 60ms for the next 5 minutes.
    3.  If the sign says WET PAINT, you try to touch it anyway.
    3a. Stains on your undies match the wall paint color.
    4.  You like to walk through the department store and stare at the female manicans.
    4a. You ever tried to look under the skirt of a manakin.
    5.  You take a cup of coffee, but leave about a table spoon's worth in the pot at the company coffe maker.
    5a. You use half a pack of (pick one)Sweetner, Sugar, and leave the other half of the pack in the container.
    6.  You grab the mail when you arrive home from work and head straight for the bathroom.
    6a. You come out a few pieces short and the toilet won't flush.
    7.  You make noises at the table (either end) and fuss at your kids when they do it.
    7a. You have ever allowed your kids to run amok in a restraunt.
    8.   You comment about soap operas on TV but sit and watch Jerry Springer.
    8a. You think soaps are more important than Jerry Springer.
    9.  You make comments about how fat everyone else is, but you are 100 pounds over weight.
    9a. Only if the subject of your comment is a guy.
    [/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>

    And for the kids:

    10. You think your miscreant, ugly,  brainless children are cute when they misbehave in public.

    11. You have ever used the word &quot;time out&quot; with your kids outside of sports.

    12. If you let a kid of yours out of the house looking like they fell into a tackle box.

    13. If your kid burns incense and you don't know it that hides the smell of pot.

    14. If you think looking like the Columbine killers is acceptable apparrel for your kid.

    15. Anyone, anyplace, any time who has ever used the word &quot;hassle&quot;.

    Expound it out your tailpipe!   LOL [​IMG]
     
  2. Guest

    Guest Guest

    Speaking of tourists and Black socks

    You go on vacation and wear knee high black socks, sandals, and have a camcorder and a camera.

    I saw some of these in my jaunts through the orient. [​IMG]
     
  3. W6EZ

    W6EZ Ham Member QRZ Page

    I must admit I do wear a cover indoors sometimes.
    And I keep a beater pickup (1980).
    Oh, the shame..
    I won't try to make my level of doofunisication seem lesser than those who have more check marks on the list than I do.
    I will just take my lumps.
     
  4. WF7I

    WF7I Ham Member QRZ Page

    You're a doofus if every other word you use is &quot;absolutely&quot;, in order to sound more smart.

    ...if when you smile, you have to jut out all 234 teeth and all the gums you have, like a living skeleton (or like half of the women in the audience of the Oprah show).

    ...you use terms like &quot;hum dinger&quot;, &quot;dad gum it&quot;, or &quot;dang&quot;.

    ...you insist on using obscure non-standard phonetics on the air which are confusing and irritating, like &quot;Aaron&quot;.

    ...you think it's cool to act phoney, like the people on the show &quot;friends&quot;

    ...[related to the above] you think it's REALLY cool to bray out an incredibly loud, phoney, annoying laugh at work every 10 seconds at non-funny comments, so that the office next to you has to close it's doors.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. AB8RU

    AB8RU Ham Member QRZ Page

    Welcome back Steve , I'll add some myself..

    You might be a Doofus if..

    1 A ) you come from accross the pond asking why should I be speaking english and go on this Loooong soap box of an issue [​IMG]

    1 B ) You were just put on the Terrorist Most Wanted List by the FBI .

    1 C ) You belong to an organization that Opposes the United States of America.

    1 D ) You think Ham Operators are Stuck up and you do not even possess a valid Amateur Radio License just because they refuse to talk to you.

    1 E ) You are trying to sell Illeagle Junk on E-Bay.

    1 D... was just asked by me Yesterday I told him that maybe getting a Ham license will make you legal.

    also Elmering a Trucker who's Retiring to get his License,

    thats cool !

    [​IMG]
     
  6. KM5FL

    KM5FL Ham Member QRZ Page

    </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (AB8RU @ May 26 2004,18:39)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Welcome back Steve  [​IMG][/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
    Steve's not back.. This thread is 2 months old.. Steve started it before he &quot;signed off&quot;..

    Who's the Doofus?? Naa.. I might get scolded for naming names..  [​IMG]   [​IMG]

    KM5FL
     
  7. W0UZR

    W0UZR Ham Member QRZ Page

    </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (w3sy @ Mar. 02 2004,10:49)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">You MIGHT be a DOOFUS if....[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
    If you look like this??

    [​IMG]


    P.S. Where in the hill have you been?
     
  8. NU4G

    NU4G Ham Member QRZ Page

    [​IMG]8--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WF7I @ May 27 2004,19[​IMG]8)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">...you insist on using obscure non-standard phonetics on the air which are confusing and irritating, like &quot;Aaron&quot;.[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>

    Hmmmmm... You mean Nocturnal Urges 4 Goats is not proper phonetics for my call? Well, it might be proper in east TN [​IMG]

    (A &quot;friend&quot; in east Tennessee actually *used* those phonetics over a crowded repeater the other day)  [​IMG]
     
  9. W0UZR

    W0UZR Ham Member QRZ Page

    Would that would be a good way to get his GOAT?? [​IMG]
     
  10. KG4KWW

    KG4KWW Banned QRZ Page

    You MIGHT be a DOOFUS if you think CW testing should be required for HF Phone access!!!! [​IMG]
     
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