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View Full Version : Things you would like to say


kd5rpo
02-05-2005, 12:58 AM
THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY AT WORK, BUT CAN'T

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of ####.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to
pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public. This is good!
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my
way.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7 . I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point
of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Fly paper for freaks!?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...? BINGO!
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
----------------------------------------------------

I can think of a few others concerning the double speak that the guys in marketing use.


KD5RPO

KC0KBH
02-05-2005, 01:04 AM
I want to say some of those things to teachers! But, I have to hold myself back.

w3sy
02-05-2005, 01:20 AM
38. Somewhere, a village is missing its idiot.

w8wlc
02-05-2005, 01:37 AM
Dunno sounds like a normal days conversation on the ole construction site.

KC9ECI
02-05-2005, 02:02 AM
That's the nice thing about working in a small shop with a bunch of guys. We can say what's on our mind. The owner came out of the office once, walked to the far end of the shop and hung a target on a bundle of particle board, came back to the near end, picked up his rifle and commenced to sighting it in. We've drag raced remote control cars against belt sanders, had archery competitions, and any variety of mishaps, including a fellow having his wallet stapled to his but with an inch and a half narrow crown staple. Good times, good times.

kc2kde
02-05-2005, 03:03 AM
Quote[/b] (KC9ECI @ Feb. 04 2005,19:02)]and any variety of mishaps, including a fellow having his allet stapled to his but with an inch and a half narrow crown staple. #Good times, good times.
Bet he couldn't sit down for a few days! http://www.qrz.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif

KC0LFV
02-05-2005, 05:20 AM
Quote[/b] (kc2kde @ Feb. 03 2005,21:03)]Quote[/b] (KC9ECI @ Feb. 04 2005,19:02)]and any variety of mishaps, including a fellow having his allet stapled to his but with an inch and a half narrow crown staple. Good times, good times.
Bet he couldn't sit down for a few days! http://www.qrz.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Cures any problem with pick-pockets though.

W5HTW
02-05-2005, 05:24 AM
Quote[/b] (KC0LFV @ Feb. 04 2005,22:20)]Quote[/b] (kc2kde @ Feb. 03 2005,21:03)]Quote[/b] (KC9ECI @ Feb. 04 2005,19:02)]and any variety of mishaps, including a fellow having his allet stapled to his but with an inch and a half narrow crown staple. Good times, good times.
Bet he couldn't sit down for a few days! http://www.qrz.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Cures any problem with pick-pockets though.
Saves scratching, too.

"A little to the left, please, my hemmoroids still itch."

ae4fa
02-06-2005, 01:07 AM
It's been very nice meeting with you. I think we've made a lot of progress. But, if you'll excuse me, I really must scream now.

kc2kde
02-06-2005, 01:28 AM
Quote[/b] (KC0LFV @ Feb. 04 2005,22:20)]Quote[/b] (kc2kde @ Feb. 03 2005,21:03)]Quote[/b] (KC9ECI @ Feb. 04 2005,19:02)]and any variety of mishaps, including a fellow having his allet stapled to his but with an inch and a half narrow crown staple. #Good times, good times.
Bet he couldn't sit down for a few days! #http://www.qrz.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Cures any problem with pick-pockets though.
More than one way to get things done! http://www.qrz.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif

KC9ECI
02-06-2005, 01:47 AM
If you want to talk funny, you should have seen the day OSHA came through the front door. The two product designers implemented emergency plan 1...they bailed out of the office and ran through the shop throwing safety glasses at everyone and telling them to make sure all the guards were in place on the machines.

w2wtf
02-06-2005, 06:19 AM
"What in the world made you decide to do that?"

"what were his last words, Hey yall watch this?"

w5klb
02-06-2005, 06:25 AM
"This isn't an office-it's Hell with florancent lighting!"

A sign seen at work space at a Naval Air Staion:

"This is not Burger King, You will get my way or you don't the #$#$%#%!"