Problems in Amateur Radio?

[K0DXC]

This is an article that I wrote a few weeks back. I am posting it here because it was rejected by CQ and it takes way to long to show up on eham. I did have it in a nice MS word format, but when I tried to copy and paste it the format was erased.

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Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Probably bills, work, or the rising price of gas. Now tell me what comes to your mind when you think of Amateur Radio. Most of you are thinking of a wonderful hobby that is meant to last ages and bring one and all, young and old together in friendship by the way of this fine hobby. Others instantly think of contesting and the thrill of competing against others while another group think of DXing and how they snagged the “good one” last night at 1:00 a.m. There are some who even think of all those things I just mentioned above. But another group stands out to me; that is the group that worries about ham radio; they worry that not enough young people are getting into this hobby. They worry that CW will be lost, they worry that ham radio will die off, they worry that not enough people will get into HF. Now that I mentioned those last couple of things, you might be worrying too.

These people stand out to me because they worry. They speak their mind when others hold their tongue and they are normally the first to point some things out. They are the first to speak their opinions about not enough youth getting into this hobby. They are the first to speak their mind if in their opinion Morse Code is a dieing mode. They speak their fears of ham radio dieing off. They are the first to speak if they think that not enough people are getting into HF. They might not be the first to think of these things, but they are the first to speak them.

Are there enough youth getting into ham radio? Probably not. Are there young people getting into ham radio? Yes.

I was licensed when I was 10 and I am still a ham 3 years later. (I’m 13 now) In addition to that I can name off other youths under the age of 18 that are licensed Amateur Radio operators. Most of you are probably thinking that there aren’t nearly as many young hams out there right now as there used to be. Unfortunately, you are probably correct. Our youth population in ham radio has declined rapidly in the past couple of decades. This is probably due to the new era of technology; cell phones, internet, video games, and many more things in addition to that now fill the minds of children. Even I myself like to play video games and being in school I use the internet a lot for researching papers, homework, ect. I myself have worried about this problem, there have only been a few rare occasions when I have talked to another kid my age on the air. How can we get youth into this hobby? SPREAD THE WORD! Out of all the kids I have mentioned ham radio to, none of them had ever heard of it before. This proves that we are not getting the word out about this fine hobby. Out of all the kids that I have talked to about ham radio, ALL of them have wanted to get their Amateur Radio licenses. (I’m not saying all of them have gotten their license but they sure wanted to) When I go to High School a couple of years from now I intend to form a radio club. It would not only publicize this hobby but it would also guarantee that a few more kids would get their tickets and join the ranks. In addition to that it would also get kids to become more of a well-rounded person. It also keeps them from doing some of the bad things SOME kids have started to do these days. (Sadly)

Another group is the ones that worry about Morse Code fading away and becoming a “dead” mode. In my opinion that will never happen. The FCC can take away all the spectrum they want (Please don’t take any more of it though, there are many out there that use it.) but there will ALWAYS be people out there that know, love, and use CW on the air. Yes, there probably aren’t as many people fluent in Morse Code now as there used to be. Yes, people back in the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s might have been a lot better at the code then we are now. (Although lets not forget that a lot of the top notch CW operators today are from the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s.) I am not saying that operators in the 2000’s aren’t as good as the ones 20 years ago. What I am saying is that 20 years ago they required 5wpm for Novice, 13wpm for General, and 20wpm for Extra. Now in 2008 you can get a Technician by not even learning the code at all. To be honest with you, I think that it is okay that there is no Morse Code requirement for the Technician class license. There are some work cases in which company owners will have some employees get their Tech so if in an emergency situation they can get word out and call for help. I am all for Hospitals and other work places having an emergency Amateur Radio setup and licensed employees so that if there was a small explosion or the power ran out it would take a simple Auto-Patch through the local repeater and the fire-department, police, or whatever emergency force you need is on its way. This method is also a lot faster then sending a “runner” down to the police station. (I don’t know why I put that last sentence in there, in school the teachers like to test our speed and run our energy out by making us run errands for them. It was a really “cheesy” sentence but I think I’ll keep it in there for the fun of it.) But I DO think there should be a Morse Code requirement for the General and Extra class licenses. I don’t care if it is only 5wpm; 5wpm is better then 0wpm. Morse Code is not only a ton of fun to operate; it is also a traditional Amateur Radio mode. When hams first started out in the 1920’s all they had was Morse Code. SSB modes didn’t come out until the 50’s or later. (Note to experts, that is approximate history dating, I’m not sure of the actual time period when hams began to experiment with SSB on the air. I think it’s the 50’s though) In addition to being a tradition, it is FAR MORE EFFICIENT THEN SSB!!! I have heard saying before that 5 watts CW = 100 watts SSB. (Again, I am not sure on this but it is probably true…. Approximately) CW is way better for DXing, contesting, weak signal work…. You name it, CW does it better the SSB in most cases. It also takes up less bandwidth than SSB; another big advantage to this mode.

Even after I present all the information to you on CW in the paragraph above, there will always be people who just “hate” CW and want it to go away. Here is what I have to say to those people, and to the people who doubt the other paragraph…… I am 13 years old, licensed at age 10, and I learned Morse Code (5wpm on a straight key) at age 8. That proves that if you put your mind to it, it can be done. People complain all the time that the code is “too hard for them” or “I don’t have time to learn”. These are both bad excuses in my opinion. There are always the people who actually can’t learn the code because of some unfortunate disability, and I am sorry that they can’t and I won’t think badly of them for not being able to learn the code. Many others out there work a busy life. If you honestly have a reason that really does disable your ability to learn the code, I have nothing against you. Let me make this clear to you that I have nothing against anybody who doesn’t learn the code whether they can or can’t. I simply wish they would give it a try, they would have so much fun (in most cases, there are people out there who don’t like the code) if they gave the mode a try. Anyways, I am a 13 year old CW operator. If I had to guess how long I was going to live right now I would say I will probably make it to about 60-70 years old age. Maybe more, maybe less; you never know how long you are going to live. So I approximately have 50 years to live. In 50 years the year will be 2058. That means that Morse Code will AT LEAST last until the year of 2058 because I will still be around until that time. In addition to that I will make a guarantee to all of the old timers out there who have a worry for this traditional art. In the rest of my lifetime, I will teach at least one person Morse Code; if that happens the mode will not die off with me. I hope that there is always more then one person out there on the air with CW though; I doubt that I will ever see Morse Code die off. It is to good a mode to diminish into the ages. I will be using CW to the end of my life; when I’m in my old age you won’t see me yakking away on a microphone, I’ll be pounding brass! All in all, my suggestion to you is to give CW a try if you haven’t already.

The Next group is the ones that think ham radio is “going to the dogs” and either won’t be around or won’t be the same in 50 years.
Will ham radio be around in 50 years? Yes.
I think that ham radio will surely be around in 50 years. It is too great of a hobby for people to actually lose interest and let this hobby die off. Everyday there are new people that get their license and join the ranks. Not just in the U.S.A. either; there are plenty of hams getting licenses all around the world which adds to the count of DX operators in the world; DXing is another great part of ham radio.
Will ham radio be the same in the future as it is now? Probably not.
We are currently in an era of technology. Human beings are making some sort of advancement that helps improve our lives, our living style, or something that effects our lives every day. Even I as a teenager have trouble keeping up with some of the advancements people have been making. There is no doubt that ham radio will be different in the future. Ham radio has already seen so many advancements. Old timers probably remember their first Heathkit from their first ticket. Some hams didn’t even have Heathkits. It was the homebrewing age, hams would build most of the ham equipment they owned and operated. Then came the first 50 watt solid state transceiver. Then came the first 100 watt solid state transceiver. Now there are radios out there that run a whopping 200 watts without an external amplifier!

Now the question is will the changes be bad or good? We can only hope they will be good. So far most of the changes in ham radio have been. I hope that new hams that get their licenses find the part of ham radio they love. Whether it be 50Mhz or above doing AREAS or public service or maybe they will try out HF and be bitten by the DX, contest, or ragchew bug. My hope is that they fall in love with ham radio and enjoy this hobby for the rest of their live. When a person loves something, they will go to great lengths to try and preserve the thing that they love. That is why I hope they fall in love with ham radio.

As for the last question of “Will enough people get into HF?” I will tell you this; when people try out HF (they probably will at some point of their ham radio career whether it be at the club field day or while experimenting one day) they will love it if it is their calling in ham radio. All people are different and so not all hams will love HF, but a ton of hams will. I hear tons of activity on the HF bands everyday, and with all the great hams and great people out there encouraging people to get into this hobby I doubt HF will diminish any time soon if at all.

That just about brings this article to a close. I hope I have opened your eyes to make you realize both sides of ham radio, the positive side and the worrying/negative side. I hope you were not impacted in a bad way by reading this article, I meant it to make people realize that ham radio is in good shape. When I read through online Amateur Radio discussion forums I see a large group of people that are constantly expressing their fears of bad things happening to this hobby. I predict that there will be positive things for ham radio in the future. Of course, there will also be bad things that happen in this hobby, we just need to focus on solving the problems and then return to enjoying this hobby and everything it has to offer. I would like to give a very big thank you to my grandpa, K9MMS, for all the phone conversations we have had about some of these same topics. He has inspired me in many ways and in addition to that he is the reason I found this hobby and got interested enough to get licensed. All of our conversations have greatly opened my mind and I would like to also thank him for sharing his knowledge with me. That is all for now, thanks to all who took the time to read this. I look forward to meeting you on the air someday if we ever get the chance.

73,
Cal, K0DXC

[ab8ro]

Listen to your writing teachers, they have something to offer.

[N2RJ]

And don't listen to Darrel. He has nothing to offer.

[KI6NNO]

I'm curious as to why QST rejected it, and why you'd assume that we'd be more interested in reading rejected material than the QST editor?

That might sound harsh, but I really am interested in the reason.

Oh wait, it's arrogant, pesumptive, and preachy - three definite journalism killers.

Examples:
Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Probably bills, work, or the rising price of gas.
Ok, so you've demanded my attention (not cool), and read my mind. Then again, maybe something else is bothering me more - like a poor relationship, or a sick child, or I need a new pair of 6146B's. Maybe I just might not be worried at the moment and neither might your audience be.

I was licensed when I was 10 and I am still a ham 3 years later. (I’m 13 now) In addition to that I can name off other youths under the age of 18 that are licensed Amateur Radio operators.
Big whoop. Grats on your license and staying with the hobby. But - how do you think your stating that comes across to Hams that got into the hobby in their later years? or maybe were 11 or 14 when they were licensed? Find a way to show commonality with your audience, not show how you are different than most.

Now the question is will the changes be bad or good? We can only hope they will be good.
Unless there's a mouse in your pocket, there's no "we" when it comes to your opinion.

I hope I have opened your eyes to make you realize both sides of ham radio...
Yep, that one's a sure fire way to alienate your audience. Who are you to think that I need my eyes opened? And there's only two sides to ham radio?

Now you do have some good information in there that could get people's attention without demanding it and without showing how your personal choices add relevancy to the theme of the article.

Just some things to consider. By taking the current "personal" approach out of the article, it could make a decent read for your intended audience. (grammar issues not withstanding).

fwiw, I hope this came across as constructive.

73 de Dave.

[K0DXC]

It was rejected by CQ, sorry about the mistake, I'll go edit my first post. Anyways, I have no idea why it was rejected. W2VU said he would tell me more about things later this week. (He didn't say it was rejected, he said that he couldn't use it in that format. Maybe he'll take it, maybe he won't.)

I posted my article here because in the past most hams here have always wanted to read them and some of them suggested I posted my articles here. I decided to take their advice this time.

I couldn't care less if you like my article. If you think you are reading crap, then don't read it. It is your choice what you read, I am not forcing you to read this article.

[ab8ro]

And don't listen to Darrel. He has nothing to offer.

Incorrect! I offer criticism. IMNSHO, valid criticism. BTW, you spelled my name incorrectly.

Now, let's be more precise. The reason CQ rejected his article is because it's a rambling bucket of (poorly written) self-serving nonsense. I don't care if the author is 13 or 113, it's precisely the kind of emotional tripe that does not need encouragement.

[K0DXC]

I doubt that you even read all of my article "darrel"

You probably just read the first paragraph. IF you would have read the whole thing then you would have seen that the article was really encouragement to hams. It didn't talk about negative problems really being negative at all!

Why do you suggest I write like crap, most people think that I am an elite with typing and grammar for my age.

[ab8ro]

It was rejected by CQ, sorry about the mistake, I'll go edit my first post. Anyways, I have no idea why it was rejected. W2VU said he would tell me more about things later this week. (He didn't say it was rejected, he said that he couldn't use it in that format. Maybe he'll take it, maybe he won't.)

I posted my article here because in the past most hams here have always wanted to read them and some of them suggested I posted my articles here. I decided to take their advice this time.

I could care less if you like my article. If you think you are reading crap, then don't read it. It is your choice what you read, I am not forcing you to read this article.

You "could" care less? You mean that you "couldn't" care less. I didn't read much of it. Enough to offer you sound advice: listen to your writing teachers. Writing is about re-writing. Start by correcting your many grammar mistakes. In it's present form it's not an article.

[N2RJ]

Incorrect! I offer criticism.

No, you offer nothing but trolling and demoralizing of the hobby.

IMNSHO, valid criticism. BTW, you spelled my name incorrectly.

Who cares?

Now, let's be more precise. The reason CQ rejected his article is because it's a rambling bucket of (poorly written) self-serving nonsense. I don't care if the author is 13 or 113, it's precisely the kind of emotional tripe that does not need encouragement.

Pot, kettle, black.

[K0DXC]

AB8RO;

another mistake on your part by not reading enough of my post to offer your criticism.

I CLEARLY STATED BEFORE MY ARTICLE THAT THE FORMATTING WAS MESSED UP BECAUSE I COPY AND PASTED IT FROM MS WORD. Did that catch your attention?

[N2RJ]

It was rejected by CQ, sorry about the mistake, I'll go edit my first post. Anyways, I have no idea why it was rejected. W2VU said he would tell me more about things later this week. (He didn't say it was rejected, he said that he couldn't use it in that format. Maybe he'll take it, maybe he won't.)

I posted my article here because in the past most hams here have always wanted to read them and some of them suggested I posted my articles here. I decided to take their advice this time.

I could care less if you like my article. If you think you are reading crap, then don't read it. It is your choice what you read, I am not forcing you to read this article.

I can probably give you some insight as to WHY he rejected it. But I won't post it in a public forum such as this one. I'll send you an email.

I know Rich personally, BTW. He's a really nice guy.

[N2RJ]

AB8RO;

another mistake on your part by not reading enough of my post to offer your criticism.

I CLEARLY STATED BEFORE MY ARTICLE THAT THE FORMATTING WAS MESSED UP BECAUSE I COPY AND PASTED IT FROM MS WORD. Did that catch your attention?

Ignore the idiot. His life probably is very shallow anyway.

[ab8ro]

No, you offer nothing but trolling and demoralizing of the hobby.


In your opinion.


Pot, kettle, black.


Feel free to discourage anything that I write which you don't like.

[ab8ro]

Ignore the idiot. His life probably is very shallow anyway.

Look, you can disagree with me. But it's clearly stated that those types of attacks aren't allowed here. Please edit your post.

[K0DXC]

Look, you can disagree with me. But it's clearly stated that those types of attacks aren't allowed here. Please edit your post.

Awwwww, is little darrel O.K.? Is he going to need to check into the hospital after the fatal attack by Ryan? Comon Darrel, grow up. You attacked me, do you see me crying. Why don't you edit your posts?

I agree with Ryan, why in the world do you have time to post crap in my direction when you never even read my article as you even admitted?

[ab8ro]

AB8RO;
another mistake on your part by not reading enough of my post to offer your criticism.


Very little needs to be read when something is so poorly written.


I CLEARLY STATED BEFORE MY ARTICLE THAT THE FORMATTING WAS MESSED UP BECAUSE I COPY AND PASTED IT FROM MS WORD. Did that catch your attention?

I'm not sure what makes you think that yelling is going to make your weak message stronger. I was not talking about the formatting, rather, as stated, I was talking about your grammar and style. Read Dave's response.

[KI6NNO]

Very little needs to be read when something is so poorly written.

Hehe, I'm with you on that ab8ro, although I didn't want to put it in exactly those words.

I clearly showed Cal examples of what's obviously "wrong" with the article, but a whole page has gone by without a peep from him other than to dig on you. Another wasted post I guess. Go figure...

73 de Dave

[K0DXC]

Unless there's a mouse in your pocket, there's no "we" when it comes to your opinion.




I think there is more than one ham in the world who will read that. I meant "we" meaning all of the hams in the country. WE are all hams.

[N9MOQ]

. .

[K0DXC]

Hehe, I'm with you on that ab8ro, although I didn't want to put it in exactly those words.

I clearly showed Cal examples of what's obviously "wrong" with the article, but a whole page has gone by without a peep from him other than to dig on you. Another wasted post I guess. Go figure...

73 de Dave

I "dug on him" because he "dug on me"

By the way, what type of phrase is "dug on him"? Do you have a shovel in your pocket :)

[ab8ro]

Awwwww, is little darrel O.K.? Is he going to need to check into the hospital after the fatal attack by Ryan? Comon Darrel, grow up. You attacked me, do you see me crying. Why don't you edit your posts?

I agree with Ryan, why in the world do you have time to post crap in my direction when you never even read my article as you even admitted?

Yet more for you to learn young man. I attacked your writing, not you. Your writing is lousy. I didn't call you names. I don't really care other than it's been stated that name-calling, or ad-hominem attacks, aren't allowed here. Why, you might ask? Because children, like you, are reading the site and we must keep the material family friendly.

[ab8ro]

Hehe, I'm with you on that ab8ro, although I didn't want to put it in exactly those words.

I clearly showed Cal examples of what's obviously "wrong" with the article, but a whole page has gone by without a peep from him other than to dig on you. Another wasted post I guess. Go figure...

73 de Dave

Hi Dave,

Yep, you did a great job. I suggested that he read your response. It seems that he's so caught up in being "dissed" that he's not open to criticism.

[KI6NNO]

I think there is more than one ham in the world who will read that. I meant "we" meaning all of the hams in the country. WE are all hams.

That's exactly my point. WE are all hams, however not all readers of CQ are hams, and not all hams have the same opinions as YOU do.

When you get a chance, take a course in logic, it will show you how common logical fallacies lead to conclusions like yours. No disrespect intended as the courses are college level and you may not have been exposed to that kind of material yet.

73 de Dave

[K0DXC]

we must keep the material family friendly.

Who is "We"

You attack my grammar and then you make a mistake of your own. Ryan attacked your life-style. Not you. He didn't say, AB8RO is a lousy person. He said you have a shallow life. If you want to take it as a personal attack because he attacked something about you; then I will take you attacking my grammar as personal because it is a part of me.

I have no problem with you giving me grammar pointers, what I don't like is you coming right out and saying my grammar is lousy and so is everything about my article. How many articles have you written before that have been published in magazines?

[K0DXC]

That's exactly my point. WE are all hams, however not all readers of CQ are hams, and not all hams have the same opinions as YOU do.

When you get a chance, take a course in logic, it will show you how common logical fallacies lead to conclusions like yours. No disrespect intended as the courses are college level and you may not have been exposed to that kind of material yet.

73 de Dave

Yes, but if you are reading CQ you most likely have an interest in ham radio. I wasn't saying "We all like CW". I was saying "We can only hope the changes in ham radio are for the better." Most people reading CQ would agree with me. If they don't, they have no place in ham radio.

I make mistakes, we all do. I have no problem if you give me pointers in a nice way.

No disrespect taken or meant.

[N9MOQ]

. .

[ab8ro]

Who is "We"


All on this site, me, you, everyone who posts, everyone who participates, in other words(word), we.


You attack my grammar and then you make a mistake of your own.


As I said, feel free to criticize. Of course, in this case, you're wrong. Moreover, you fail to understand your fallacy. Criticisms themselves need not be error free. In other words, I could use the worst grammar possible to criticize your grammar and it would still be no less valid. Said in terms easier to understand, two wrongs don't make a right.


Ryan attacked your life-style. Not you.


Calling someone an idiot is an ad hominem attack.


How many articles have you written before that have been published in magazines?

Although it's not relevant, I have published in a technical magazine with national readership. That is, in a magazine which you can (could) buy at the grocery store. I will tell you straight out, however, that the article that I'm thinking of was VERY poorly written and in hindsight I'm amazed that it was published. So, to be clear, just because something is published does not mean that it's well written. We now return full circle back to the beginning.

Listen to your writing teachers, they have something to offer.

[KI6NNO]

I make mistakes, we all do. I have no problem if you give me pointers in a nice way.

Ok, now explain to me exactly what wasn't nice about what I posted for your benefit that would cause you to write that?

...Most people reading CQ would agree with me. If they don't, they have no place in ham radio.
This is the kind of crap that I've read from you that really chaps my hind end as a reader, regardless of whether or not I'm a ham. You apparently don't care what other people think, as long as they agree with you. Thus, there's little wonder why my first impression of your article was "arrogant, presumptive, and preachy".

I suppose I'm done being "nice", although I'd prefer holding a constructive conversation with you rather than the diss-fest you're having with ab8ro.

The last thing I want to do is discourage you from writing, and I commend you for taking the time to write the article - there are numerous good points in there, but honestly there's room for improvement OM, and some of the issues have been pointed out. I wouldn't at all mind seeing a revision in CQ.

73, de Dave.

[ab8ro]

Yes, but if you are reading CQ you most likely have an interest in ham radio. I wasn't saying "We all like CW". I was saying "We can only hope the changes in ham radio are for the better." Most people reading CQ would agree with me. If they don't, they have no place in ham radio.

I make mistakes, we all do. I have no problem if you give me pointers in a nice way.

No disrespect taken or meant.

Criticism doesn't have to be nice to be valid. Moreover, Dave was very polite and professional in his response. Blaming the reader because you fail to convey your meaning is a rookie writer's mistake. That aside, his point still holds. There are places for the "royal we" but this isn't one of them. It's often, correctly, or incorrectly, used in scientific writing to refer to a group effort and similarly in mathematical proofs, again without regard to correctness, to refer to the proof writer and the reader.

Frankly, I think the use of "we" is symptomatic of larger problems and I suspect Dave was trying to gently lead you to them.

[K0DXC]

Although it's not relevant, I have published in a technical magazine with national readership.

good work.

[K0DXC]

I suppose I'm done being "nice", although I'd prefer holding a constructive conversation with you rather than the diss-fest you're having with ab8ro.

The last thing I want to do is discourage you from writing, and I commend you for taking the time to write the article - there are numerous good points in there, but honestly there's room for improvement OM, and some of the issues have been pointed out. I wouldn't at all mind seeing a revision in CQ.

73, de Dave.

Thank you Dave.

I really meant for the article to have a nice impression on people. I suppose I shouldn't have taken certain people's advice and posted it here though because the only thing it has done is cause me to spend more time on the computer then I wanted to answering posts.

as for AB8RO, I am not trying to be mean to him. He wasn't pleasant to Ryan and I simply defended one of my good friends.

There is always room for improvement, I thank you for actually taking the time to read through the whole article and point out what is wrong. Compared to some of the people in this world who write that article was a piece of crud. However, I am 13 and so I normally don't catch all the college level mistakes. I have though of sending articles around to other people to edit in addition to myself but then I can't really take full credit for the article so I have held off from doing this.

[K0HWY]

I'm not going to speculate about why your article was not accepted but I will offer my own opinion, without chopping you down and making you feel three inches tall. :rolleyes:

First, I'm impressed that you actually took the time to sit down and write the article. Your dedication to the hobby and determination to help keep it alive in the years to come is very apparent. I wish more young people your age were as involved with educational hobbies and approached them with the same level of enthusiasm.

Secondly, there's the issue of your writing. For a 13 year old, this isn't bad at all. I would venture to say that it's well above average for folks of your age. And that's based on what I've actually seen, not speculation. In fact, I think your writing abilities could exceed that of many adults. Sure, there are some things that could be fixed but it's not THAT bad.

There are things in your article I agree with, wholeheartedly. There are also some things that make me wonder what you smoked before you wrote them :D (just kidding). We all have different views of the same subjects so I'm not going to pick on you about content. You are expressing your views and I think you did an overall fine job at doing just that.

This article is not a masterpiece by any means. BUT, it's not bad either and certainly not deserving of getting picked apart as it has been. If it doesn't get published, I'm sure you'll be disappointed. But, don't give up.

This has nothing to do with the price of eggs in China but I'll tell you a quick story. Not sure if this story is true but it was conveyed to me my my former voice instructor who was a professional singer with a well known southern gospel quartet. A young man who was interested in becoming a lead singer with a professional quartet went to a well known singer who had been established in the business for some time. The young fellah gave it his all but the quartet pro was not impressed. He told the kid to go home and try something else, that he just didn't have what it took to be a professional singer. The kid's name was Elvis Presley.

[W5HTW]

I "dug on him" because he "dug on me"

By the way, what type of phrase is "dug on him"? Do you have a shovel in your pocket :)

Now that's trite. Get back to the subject of the article, please.

[W4DFW]

Cal:

Go back and read the first post by KI6NNO. That one is really on the mark. Forget about the other personal "attacks" and focus on the critical comments. Writing for an audience is often not easy. You must find common ground right away and not alienate your audience by immediately honing in on your perception of what is wrong. You gingerly take them down that road, but only *after* you have won them over by suggesting the commonality between you and the reader. I know you *think* you did this, but you didn't.

Don't fret. It's only a waste when you don't learn from your mistakes. Keep up the good work and it won't be long before we see that piece in QST or CQ!

.............Bob

[WA0LYK]

I'll provide a little criticism. Your article is WAY too LONG and WORDY.

Magazines live and die on the information they provide and the number of pages it takes to print it. Brevity and being concise are the buzz words for magazine articles. As recommended, listen to your writing teachers and not just the ones who praise your writing, find ones that give you criticism and lots of it.

Also, your piece is basically an opinion - yours - and as such is most appropriate for the editorial or letters to the editor pages. Most magazines zealously guard their editorial page and your opinion piece must coincide exactly with their thoughts and what they are publishing at the time. Your piece just may not fit the bill for CQ.

Printed media are not blogs and require careful writing. Here is an example of your first paragraph and a rough draft of me rewriting it. Count the words!

Yours

"Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Probably bills, work, or the rising price of gas. Now tell me what comes to your mind when you think of Amateur Radio. Most of you are thinking of a wonderful hobby that is meant to last ages and bring one and all, young and old together in friendship by the way of this fine hobby. Others instantly think of contesting and the thrill of competing against others while another group think of DXing and how they snagged the “good one” last night at 1:00 a.m. There are some who even think of all those things I just mentioned above. But another group stands out to me; that is the group that worries about ham radio; they worry that not enough young people are getting into this hobby. They worry that CW will be lost, they worry that ham radio will die off, they worry that not enough people will get into HF. Now that I mentioned those last couple of things, you might be worrying too."

Mine

"Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Bills, work, personal problems? Amateur Radio brings to mind what? Do you think of a wonderful hobby bringing everyone together? How about contesting? Maybe other areas hams enjoy? To me, one group stands out, those that worry about ham radio."

A good college professor would have more marks on your essay than you could count. I'll guarantee it would get an F. The first ones I ever wrote sounded just like yours, rambling and wordy, and they got F's. I too thought a good essay meant using lots of words - WRONG! Lots of good ideas stated as briefly as possible is what is wanted.

Jim
WA0LYK

[ab8ro]

as for AB8RO, I am not trying to be mean to him. He wasn't pleasant to Ryan and I simply defended one of my good friends.


Which simply hi-lights the fact that you are a child "hanging out" with adults. True this is a family forum in principal, but in reality, it's not.


I am 13 and so I normally don't catch all the college level mistakes.


I'm not talking about only college level mistakes. I'm talking about 7th grade mistakes that good students should catch. Certainly an "elite" 7th grade writer should be able to catch such mistakes.

The earlier reference to "college" material was in reference to a class in logic. Certainly, this is typically taught in college, but, it is not a topic beyond the grasp of an "elite" 7th grade student.

I don't believe that you need me to tell you that you've long exceeded your welcome to rely on the "I'm only 13" crutch here. You're welcome to display as much arrogance as you like, just don't expect any sympathy for your age.

[N2RJ]

The whole issue with the article, Cal, is the grammar and spelling make it a bit difficult to read.

I will also agree with K0HWY - the whole idea of criticism is to help improve, not belittle or discourage. What Darrel is offering is NOT criticism, and somehow he seems to take pleasure out of belittling people. That shows signs of some serious issues if you have to belittle 13 year olds.

You can get your point across with manners and tact, or you can be a jerk. If you choose the latter, be prepared for backlash.

By the way darrel, I am not editing my post. Go cry to the moderators if you want, but I would rather see an apology to Calvin from you and some geniune constructive criticism.

[W5HTW]

I'm with HWY. For a 13 year old, you didn't do really badly at it. I think you would have been wise to show it to your English teacher for some editing.

I speak as a professional writer and editor, which I was for years. But then I'm a lot older than you! When I was 15 my English teacher insisted I become a writer. I did not. It was many years later before I turned in that direction.

You have potential as a writer, at least as a conveyor of ideas. But other questions arise. Who was the target audience of the article? Did you assure it was submitted as an Opinion article? It really contains no facts at all, just opinions. (Yes, I read it.) As such it is more of a "Letter" than an article. It is far in excess of the word count most magazines will accept, probably at least three times in excess, and quite a bit of it is repetitious.

Do you enjoy writing, for writing's sake? If so, make certain you take advantage of the English Composition courses I hope are still available in high school. If you are only concerned with posting opinions about ham radio, and not writing per se, then write your article but then have it edited by someone who does that. Perhaps your teacher, or a friend in the newspaper business?

I read the article, then browsed through it two more times. Each time I came out asking myself, "What is the point of it?" It's rather hard to follow, or at least I found it so.

I'm a bit spoiled by technical writing and editing, though I also wrote for newspapers and broadcasting. The concept of brevity and conciseness is part of that business. Here, on the ZED, we can be wordy all we want, and I almost always am! I like the opportunity to get out of the constraints. But QRZ isn't paying me, so I don't have to worry about the Editor saying "cut it down, cut it down." When writers are being paid for their work, the publishers work very hard to keep the word count down! Words are space, and space is expensive.

Take a new look at your article. See if you can figure out exactly what message you are attempting to convey, and to whom. Tailor it for that audience. Drain the gravy off it and leave the meat.

Good luck

[KI6NNO]

Cal,

Well, I'm usually a bit wordy myself, hihi...
While others noted the need to define your audience and connect with them, I want to post something about how to lead readers to the same conclusion that you're trying to convey. I hope that you find it helpful (at least I think you will and it was helpful to me in my career).

The Syllogism:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Syllogism

There are 16 syllogistic logic forms where two statements lead to a conclusion, and the conclusion is undeniable given that the original statements are true. Note that the statements must be true in order to correctly support the logical conclusion. (there are more ways than this, but these are the basic constructs)

For example:

All hams are people.
All amateur radio licensees are hams.
Therefore all amateur radio licensees are people. (Modus Ponens or MP)

However the form:
All hams are people.
All hams have radio licenses.
Therefore all amateur radio licensees are people.

violates a logical rule (you can't affirm a conclusion by two positive minor terms in MP) and thus cannot be derived without a doubt from the preceeding statements. I know that it seems like you should be able to do this, but there's sound mathematical proof behind it why that's not the case.

The point here being that in presenting arguments that lead to a conclusion, properly formulating the argument not only makes the point clear to the reader, but shows that you've taken the time to assess the soundness of the argument and conclusion. If journalism is in your future, this is truly important as employers can be liable for published work by their writers.


The other main part of this is the Venn Diagram:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venn_diagram

This construct shows the union or non-union of the premises made in statements and thus whether or not a given statement is truthfully supported by the elements selected by the statement.

So in the case of a Venn Diagram, we could say that in the attachment image at the bottom that "A" represents BIRDS and "B" represents WEBBED FEET. Thus the union of these two sets would include BIRDS with WEBBED FEET. Now we can say that DUCKS have webbed feet as indeed they do (although we'd need to add another circle for ducks), but we can't decisively say that all ducks have webbed feet with just the information we have so far in the diagram.

So to take this back to the article, "A" could be HAMs and "B" could be PEOPLE WITH CAL's OPINION ABOUT HAM RADIO. Thus, the union of the two areas would describe HAMS WITH CAL's OPINION ABOUT HAM RADIO. And as one can see, if there is any amount of circle A that is outside of circle B, there would be some number of Hams that don't have Cal's opinion about ham radio.

Now whether or not you think those people should vacate the hobby or not really isn't relevant. ;) But the point here is that you as a writer can use tools like this to lead your audience to the same conclusions that you're trying to make in your arguments (which aren't unreasonable and I'm glad that you're taking the time to point some things out to readers).


Anyway, this goes back to the article in defining the way that statements should be made in order to support conclusions. It also allows an author to take opinion out of the picture when formulating an argument to put before their readers. By separating opinion from an article where it's not necessary, many journalistic pitfalls can be avoided. Is it "dry reading" do do this"? It can be, but that's where the talent of the writer comes in to play - in creating an article that is worth reading, and that the reader enjoys taking the time to read.

Again, keep up writing. I'd like to see more of what you've got in you.

73, de Dave

[W5HTW]

I see WA0LYK beat me to just about every point, as I was still writing it. Well, at least you have three opinions the same, including HWY's.

[ab8ro]

I'll provide a little criticism. Your article is WAY too LONG and WORDY.


Bingo!


As recommended, listen to your writing teachers and not just the ones who praise your writing, find ones that give you criticism and lots of it.


Precisely.


Here is an example of your first paragraph and a rough draft of me rewriting it. Count the words!

Yours

"Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Probably bills, work, or the rising price of gas. Now tell me what comes to your mind when you think of Amateur Radio. Most of you are thinking of a wonderful hobby that is meant to last ages and bring one and all, young and old together in friendship by the way of this fine hobby. Others instantly think of contesting and the thrill of competing against others while another group think of DXing and how they snagged the “good one” last night at 1:00 a.m. There are some who even think of all those things I just mentioned above. But another group stands out to me; that is the group that worries about ham radio; they worry that not enough young people are getting into this hobby. They worry that CW will be lost, they worry that ham radio will die off, they worry that not enough people will get into HF. Now that I mentioned those last couple of things, you might be worrying too."

Mine

"Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Bills, work, personal problems? Amateur Radio brings to mind what? Do you think of a wonderful hobby bringing everyone together? How about contesting? Maybe other areas hams enjoy? To me, one group stands out, those that worry about ham radio."


Calvin,

Beyond just the reduction in size, note the change in tone (as well as the correction of punctuation) in the second sentence. Can you see how removing the word "probably" removes your projection onto the reader?


A good college professor would have more marks on your essay than you could count. I'll guarantee it would get an F.


Yes. In case Calvin doesn't know, I presume that you're talking about english 101, or even a remedial class. These are among the first classes students take in college and sometimes in high school. In other words, your criticism isn't far beyond where his ability should lie and is certainly appropriate.


The first ones I ever wrote sounded just like yours, rambling and wordy, and they got F's. I too thought a good essay meant using lots of words - WRONG! Lots of good ideas stated as briefly as possible is what is wanted.


Indeed! I had a great 101 prof who offered to review papers as many times as necessary prior to grading. It took me eleven re-writes of that first college essay and I still only got a B. Surely it would have been an F with a less patient professor.

[N2RJ]

I will agree that 'having a point' is the most important thing. I also like to get to the point. One thing I learned quickly was that a good article has less fluff and more substance. An article that has too much "fluff" is referred to as a "snow job" where you are burying the actual content with meaningless sentences.

I definitely think you could benefit from some writing classes if they're offered where you are. My writing these days is more along the lines of summaries for nontechnical senior management types and execs, as well as clear, concise instructions for technical people. Getting to the point is very important.

[W4DFW]

Ah, so now we can rewrite the article!! COOL!! I was thinking the same . . .

"Tell me, what is on your mind right now? Probably bills, work, or the rising price of gas. Why begin with something so down? You want the audience to embrace you, not say "ugh!" Now tell me what comes to your mind when you think of Amateur Radio. Most of you are thinking Uh oh! You're about to drop the hammer here! Not good!of a wonderful hobby that is meant to last ages and bring one and all, young and old together in friendship by the way of this fine hobby. Others instantly think of contesting and the thrill of competing against others while another group thinks of DXing and how they snagged the “good one” last night at 1:00 a.m. There are some who even think of all those things I just mentioned above. But another group stands out to me; that is the group that worries about ham radio; they worry that not enough young people are getting into this hobby. They worry that CW will be lost, they worry that ham radio will die off, they worry that not enough people will get into HF. Now that I mentioned those last couple of things, you might be worrying too."

There is something to being concise. Maybe the publication wants that, maybe not. You must know what they are looking for.

Here's what I would write:

"Ham radio is a new hobby I love. I often sneak to the shack late at night after my parents are in bed in search of new ones on 40 and 80 meters. Last night was no different, though I thought for a moment my forgetting to plug in the headphones awakened my mother! Alas, I was safe and ventured onward to conquer the world of DX! Is VP6DX still on? I strained my ears to hear the weak signals, hoping beyond hope that I might snag a new one.

But through my searching of the weak signals, I pondered a most chilling thought. Has ham radio lost its karma? Its Raison d'être?

I'm a young ham, only 13 years old. Where are the others my age? Where have they all gone and how do we get them back? Does the end of CW spell the doom for ham radio? Suddenly I felt empty in the shack as I wondered what has become of this great hobby that I have know for such a short time."

I haven't, I don't think, created any sense of distrust between me and the audience (at least not yet). I haven't opined with anything that others can't relate to. I have stuck us all in the same boat and neatly suggested we look out at what is coming in a way we all can do together.

Hook your audience first by being one of them, then yank the lure and set it!

[K0DXC]

Thanks for all the advice everyone.

That was one of the first articles I have ever written, most of them were only edited by myself. I submitted one to NCJ (going in the Jul/Aug issue) and it is 2,740 words long! Al, K0AD accepted it and said that it was great. He tells me that he likes it just the way it is but that he might have to do some editing on it to save space in NCJ. I do agree with everyones opinion on shortening things out. I have little experience in writing ham radio related articles so I am still learning some of the basics as I admit. The grammar parts of writing will come to me as I get older but I should start cutting some of the extra words.

One of the reasons things I write include so much detail is that I love to read. I naturally think that the longer it is the better. I now know that isn't true in most cases.

When given a writing assignment in my Reading/Language arts class the teacher generally gives us some "brainstorming" tools (including the ven diagram) and those generally help a lot. I guess I should try some of them out with my radio articles in the future.

[ab8ro]

The whole issue with the article, Cal, is the grammar and spelling make it a bit difficult to read.

I will also agree with K0HWY - the whole idea of criticism is to help improve, not belittle or discourage. What Darrel is offering is NOT criticism, and somehow he seems to take pleasure out of belittling people. That shows signs of some serious issues if you have to belittle 13 year olds.

You can get your point across with manners and tact, or you can be a jerk. If you choose the latter, be prepared for backlash.


You seem to be working under the delusion that I ACTUALLY care what you think.


By the way darrel, I am not editing my post.


I wasn't actually expecting you to. You didn't naively think that I was, did you?


Go cry to the moderators if you want


Of course, I reported your post right away. Calling people names is an ad-hominem attack which isn't allowed here. Those are the rules, I didn't make them.

and some geniune constructive criticism.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Rather than yet another insipid thread where everyone falsely gloats over a trite and mediocre piece of work, we have a thread where several people have openly criticized the work.

[W4INF]

Maybe one of the two...

1) He probably saw your postings on Zed and wanted to disassociate the rag with your article. (The whining like a little tyke at the grocery store checkout because mama wont let you get the Coca Puffs)

2) He saw your post on Zed, knows your 13 with abt a year in the hobby and realizes that the article would be examined by the readers on that basis. (little validity based on limited experience)

Now, if you wrote a CONSTRUCTIVE article about how great the hobby is and how you have enjoyed it, maybe that would get published. No one wants to put dim light on an activity in published form. (Cept on the Zed of course) :eek:

Calvin, I say this with the intent of constructive criticism, and I hope you take it that way. Heck, Im 41 years old and only a few here take ME serious! HA HA! (Psst... I dont care so there is a lesson in that! HA HA!)

Better luck next time-
Andrew

[W4INF]

You seem to be working under the delusion that I ACTUALLY care what you think.
Wow! I got me a new mantra! Thanks man, that is a keeper!!

Andrew

[ab8ro]

Wow! I got me a new mantra! Thanks man, that is a keeper!!

Andrew

You are most certainly welcome. BTW, good response above.

[K0DXC]

Actually, I've been licensed for 3 years. I'm still a newbie though.

[KI6NNO]

Cal, I've got to say that I've been at work an hour and a half past when I was done waiting for the next post(s) in this thread. Now before someone tells me that I need to get a life, get off the Zed, and go home (hihi), it just really struck me as to how much the folks on the Zed do care about other members whether they're 41 or 13 and take the time to do what they can to be helpful.

(not that all of them will admit it, hihi) ;)

Anyway, I'm impressed in the direction this thread took from what was on the first couple of pages.

73 de Dave

(and with that, I'm gonna jet...)

[ab8ro]

Cal, I've got to say that I've been at work an hour and a half past when I was done waiting for the next post(s) in this thread. Now before someone tells me that I need to get a life, get off the Zed, and go home (hihi), it just really struck me as to how much the folks on the Zed do care about other members whether they're 41 or 13 and take the time to do what they can to be helpful.

(not that all of them will admit it, hihi) ;)

Anyway, I'm impressed in the direction this thread took from what was on the first couple of pages.

73 de Dave

(and with that, I'm gonna jet...)

I care about keeping my entertainment top notch and insipid threads just bring it down for me.

That's right ladies, QRZ is ENTERTAINMENT!!!

[wa9cwx]

Well, I certainly like the way this thread has progressed. It has become constructive and less hostile.

The original article was rather neat, except it most certainly was NOT of a quality, either grammatically or information wise, to qualify for a a national publication.

Cal, you will have an interesting journey in life, but it IS a journey, each 'port' you arrive at will take some effort, time, experience and work.

Publication of an article in a national magazine usually is at LEAST something that takes a few years of writing, schooling, and some real experience in the field of the topic.

Publication of your OPINION in a national magazine is something that usually is a port you arrive at LATER in life !! :D

Keep up the good work, never let yourself be satisfied for more than enough time to appreciate your efforts, and keep on loving Ham Radio. :)

Frank

[N2RJ]

You seem to be working under the delusion that I ACTUALLY care what you think.



I wasn't actually expecting you to. You didn't naively think that I was, did you?



Of course, I reported your post right away. Calling people names is an ad-hominem attack which isn't allowed here. Those are the rules, I didn't make them.



Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Rather than yet another insipid thread where everyone falsely gloats over a trite and mediocre piece of work, we have a thread where several people have openly criticized the work.

I rest my case, and even feel a little sorry for you.

[N2RJ]

Maybe one of the two...

1) He probably saw your postings on Zed and wanted to disassociate the rag with your article. (The whining like a little tyke at the grocery store checkout because mama wont let you get the Coca Puffs)

Wrong.

2) He saw your post on Zed, knows your 13 with abt a year in the hobby and realizes that the article would be examined by the readers on that basis. (little validity based on limited experience)

Wrong again.

Seriously Andrew, you should be the last one talking about inexperience! I don't brag about experience, and I've only been a ham for 10 years, and hold licenses in three countries.

I don't think that being an OF with war stories is any prequalification for getting an article published. All that matters is that the content is quality and will sell magazines. That's it. It's a business.

I've been reading CQ off and on for about 18 years now, since before I became a ham, and they always seemed to want to publish articles about kids and young people in the hobby. Ditto for QST. I'm sure if Calvin's article was a bit more upbeat and he resolved the grammar issues he'd be a shoe in for publication in any magazine.

I gave him some advice in email (none of it is about any of you here, sorry to burst your collective bubble and feed some of your massively inflated egos) and I told him what I think he should do, and gave him a couple ideas about things to write about. Much of it you guys have stated here already.

Now, if you wrote a CONSTRUCTIVE article about how great the hobby is and how you have enjoyed it, maybe that would get published. No one wants to put dim light on an activity in published form. (Cept on the Zed of course) :eek:

Okay, so this proves that even a broken clock is right twice a day. ;)

[ab8ro]

I'm sure if Calvin's article was a bit more upbeat and he resolved the grammar issues he'd be a shoe in for publication in any magazine.


Perhaps, perhaps not. However, if I understand the crux of your criticism it's that the article has serious grammar issues as well as content problems. Moroever, if those were fixed it could be published? By that argument, anything ever written would be a "shoe in for publication in any magazine." All that's necessary is to write better! My god, you're a genius, you've discovered the secret to good writing!

Nonetheless, publication or no, If I'm not mistaken, it seems to me that we've heard those criticisms somewhere before. Hmmm...

Perhaps if he "listened to his writing teachers", he might learn how to correct some of those problems?

[ab8ro]

I rest my case, and even feel a little sorry for you.

Save your pity and edit your post instead. You know the rules here, you know you broke them, and all of your grandstanding doesn't change the fact that you're the only one who has. The rest of the thread has been about the topic of the thread. Only YOU resorted to personal attacks because you were unable to make your point. You only offered something here after others showed you the way.

[W4DFW]

So a 13 year old ham writes an article, has the balls to publish it here, which I think many of us would never do, and a couple of you can find nothing better to do than to try and show us which one of you has a bigger 807??

I know some folks who need to get a life, and it ain't the kid. Let's hope he doesn't learn the same bad habits of you guys!

Gimminy Cricket!!

[ab8ro]

Let's hope he doesn't learn the same bad habits of you guys!

Gimminy Cricket!!

One can only hope!

[kb3laz]

Which simply hi-lights the fact that you are a child "hanging out" with adults.

Ok not to step into your little squabble, but you keep pointing out Cal's age.
Then telling him not to use it as a crutch. Yet you keep arguing with him and others like your a child yourself. (Dont take offense to this cal) worst case scenario hes acting his age. You on the other hand not so much. Since you like advice Ill give you a little, grow up. As for being a child "hanging out" with adults as you so eloquently put it, most people on the ZED are adults. However this factor only applies to age as most have the mind set of little children

As for the article yes it had its flaws, however effort was put forth.
Being shot down is not a good way to encourage him.
Theres nothing wrong with criticism but you dont have to be a jerk about it.

[W4DFW]

One can only hope!

Indeed! :rolleyes:

[K7JEM]

The "article" reads more like a letter to the editor, and probably could be published as such if it were shortened and cleaned up a lot.

Over one third of the article is extolling CW and Morse code, pining for a return of code testing. I don't "get" that in reference to the context of the article.

A lot of good suggestions from about everyone, including RJ and RO.

And BTW, Ryan, you DO need to apologize for calling him an idiot. That is a personal attack that really has no place here. You demean yourself and your other posts by doing so.

Joe

[ab8ro]

Ok not to step into your little squabble, but you keep pointing out Cal's age.
Then telling him not to use it as a crutch. Yet you keep arguing with him and others like your a child yourself.


In your opinion. I'm sure that you meant "you're", it's a contraction for you are.


As for the article yes it had its flaws,


In spades. It wasn't an article, it was a ramble.


however effort was put forth.


So what?


Being shot down is not a good way to encourage him.


Clearly, I wasn't trying to encourage him to do anything but listen to his teachers. If he wants to be a good writer, that's what he'll do.


Theres nothing wrong with criticism but you dont have to be a jerk about it.

I don't see how telling a kid who can't write to listen to his writing teachers is being a jerk. Personally, I think giving it to kids straight teaches them a lot more than pandering to them and blowing smoke up their butt. That's my opinion, think of it what you want.

[ab8ro]

The "article" reads more like a letter to the editor, and probably could be published as such if it were shortened and cleaned up a lot.


Which is another way of saying that it reads like a typical QRZ post. Ok, no big deal, just don't call it an article :)


Over one third of the article is extolling CW and Morse code, pining for a return of code testing. I don't "get" that in reference to the context of the article.


Right, that strikes at the core of the problem, thesis!


And BTW, Ryan, you DO need to apologize for calling him an idiot.


Really Joe, don't overrate my response. It looks like Ryan did already. In another (completely non-related) thread it was suggested that ad-hominem attacks aren't allowed here and the moderators concurred. That gave me a bit of a chuckle and I asked if they were actually serious? Yes indeed, they were, you can't level ad-hominem attacks. Well, ok, good show then! So I thought I'd put that little rule to the test by reporting the post. No response yet, but the mods are busy I'm sure.

In regards to any apology, it wouldn't mean anything to me. Apologies are appropriate for misunderstandings and unintentional insults. His attack was simply the voice of his true opinion and no apology will change that.

He should, however, as per the rules, edit his post. This is, after all, a family site.


That is a personal attack that really has no place here. You demean yourself and your other posts by doing so.


He knows that already.

[kb3laz]

In your opinion. I'm sure that you meant "you're", it's a contraction for you are.



In spades. It wasn't an article, it was a ramble.



So what?



Clearly, I wasn't trying to encourage him to do anything but listen to his teachers. If he wants to be a good writer, that's what he'll do.



I don't see how telling a kid who can't write to listen to his writing teachers is being a jerk. Personally, I think giving it to kids straight teaches them a lot more than pandering to them and blowing smoke up their butt. That's my opinion, think of it what you want.

Ok yes you knew what I meant with your, you're, you are, its a forum not a class so I take the simple road. I could have typed ur instead u no what i mean bro.

Article vs rant IDK (I don't know) nor do I care. That was not my point.

As for your so what I guess effort means nothing to you.
Its or It's if you prefer you opinion so I wolnt or will not if you prefer infringe.

As for not encouraging him thats whats wrong with ppl or people 2day or today. Im sure he listens to his teachers but hes (he's) still young so hes(he's) still learning.

So if you wish to discourage people the go a head but when people take your opinion with a grain of salt you will have only yourself to blame.

l8r byes and 73 to ya I iz out

[ab8ro]

Ok yes you knew what I meant with your, you're, you are, its a forum not a class so I take the simple road. I could have typed ur instead u no what i mean bro.


Right, you took the incorrect road.


As for your so what I guess effort means nothing to you.


Ask a salesman that question and learn something about the world.


So if you wish to discourage people the go a head but when people take your opinion with a grain of salt you will have only yourself to blame.


Everyone wishes to either encourage or discourage behavior in others to some degree. The content of his "article" was typical "the sky is falling" pandering to false elitism that is so pervasive in ham radio. Thoughtful hams should discourage that sort of thinking. It's out of step with the regulatory perception of the hobby both nationally and internationally.

Unfortunately, the writing was such a mess that I simply couldn't be bothered to address it point by point. I can't imagine the tedium that junior high teachers must endure. No wonder we have rampant grade inflation.

[kb3laz]

Right, you took the incorrect road.


Ah but its is the road I chose so it was right to me.
If there is a fork in the road and I choose left while you choose right, which is correct? In my opinion it's all about what one wants. If improper grammatical abbreviation's are my cup of tea I shall drink them. You can simply pass on them and choose your own. I was not trying to start a debate, so I shall carry my points no further. Maybe down the road we will have and agreement rather than an impasse. Until then 73.

[w8znx]

Cal

your posting is unreadable
i looked at it and went hell, im not even going to try reading that

coming from somebody that loves to read
and spends all his working hours dealing in books

if im not going to even try to read your post
it is doomed not to be read

first it needs heavy editing,
no crime Hemingway had Max Perkins
( look up Max Perkins he helped make good writers, great writers )

look at your posting, scroll down to the middle
look at it for a min or so, how readable is it
how many people, are going to read it
if they keep getting lost in mid line

hit carriage return more often
you are using lines up to 42 or more words long
pull any book off your shelf, count how many words per line

you don't need to use short Linotype slug length lines like i do
for me its a crutch

want to write, do it, skip letters to the editor and editorials

write about something you did, write about your day
write about your friends and family
write about a contact you made or a fish you caught
start of with short essays
show them to your teachers ask for critical judgment

keep after it

yours truly

Mac

[ve6wtf]

erm.. seems a bit sinister there bud open it with something a little less doomy :cool:

[ab8ro]

erm.. seems a bit sinister there bud open it with something a little less doomy :cool:

Do they have vanity calls up north or is that a sequential issue?

[ve6wtf]

no vanity calls,
This was one of three I requested when I passed my basic test.

[ab8ro]

no vanity calls,
This was one of three I requested when I passed my basic test.

Ok, so you can request a call, that's in a sense a vanity. But, in any case, it's a fun call.

[WA0LYK]

Thanks for all the advice everyone.

That was one of the first articles I have ever written, most of them were only edited by myself. I submitted one to NCJ (going in the Jul/Aug issue) and it is 2,740 words long! Al, K0AD accepted it and said that it was great. He tells me that he likes it just the way it is but that he might have to do some editing on it to save space in NCJ. I do agree with everyones opinion on shortening things out. I have little experience in writing ham radio related articles so I am still learning some of the basics as I admit. The grammar parts of writing will come to me as I get older but I should start cutting some of the extra words.

One of the reasons things I write include so much detail is that I love to read. I naturally think that the longer it is the better. I now know that isn't true in most cases.

When given a writing assignment in my Reading/Language arts class the teacher generally gives us some "brainstorming" tools (including the ven diagram) and those generally help a lot. I guess I should try some of them out with my radio articles in the future.

The criticisms concerning your opinion piece apply to writing of all kinds not just ham radio articles. "Longer is better" is NEVER true when it comes to writing of any kind.

Most writers work hard at getting 'the words" just right in order to convey their thoughts exactly. Get some short stories by Hemingway or other classic author and study how they used language in short but descriptive ways. Some of the old "pulp" science fiction short stories by well known authors are also worth looking at.

Good writing is a craft and takes lots of work. Keep at it, always looking for ways to shorten your essay while keeping the main ideas and you'll produce some good stuff.

Jim
WA0LYK

[K2FTC]

i enjoyed cal's piece. i think he's a pretty smart guy and is way more intelligent than most people here.

[ky5u]

AB8RO;

another mistake on your part by not reading enough of my post to offer your criticism.

I CLEARLY STATED BEFORE MY ARTICLE THAT THE FORMATTING WAS MESSED UP BECAUSE I COPY AND PASTED IT FROM MS WORD. Did that catch your attention?
Although RO's words sound harsh, he has a point you should consider. You have interesting thoughts that are obscured by not being able to write them clearly and gramatically. I have had things "published" in other fields and I will assure you that I get someone who understands grammer and composition better than I do to proof read before submitting.

If you have an english or composition teacher, take the article above and have them go over it with you. They can explain what the issues are and you'll learn to express those interesting ideas more clearly.

[ve6wtf]

Ok, so you can request a call, that's in a sense a vanity. But, in any case, it's a fun call.


Victor Echo Six Watering The Flowers


Is a fun call?

[ab8ma]

I couldn't care less if you like my article. If you think you are reading crap, then don't read it. It is your choice what you read, I am not forcing you to read this article.


Hint: Don't ever use that language with your Hi School Honours English teacher.:)

[k8wpj]

Hi cal,

i did read your article and I wanted to let you know I think you gave it a very good effort, and it is certainly a good first shot, it would never make it to publication...

Please accept this advice as you would something said as encouragement from someone that's been there... You do have real talent as a writer, and even with the grammatical errors, I see a real intelligence, and depth in your thinking that a lot of others lack.... You have some very good ideas, but, you aren't getting them across to the reader as effectively as you might otherwise.

If you are serious about your writing, and want to get better at it, then get yourself a dictionary, and a thesaurus... Your spelling is perfect 80 percent of the time, but when it's wrong, it's really, wrong...

Real hams 'BEAP' ???

nope... no such word... look it up, it's beep...

Simple stuff like that can really distract the reader... Also, here's a DJ trick that I learned when writing copy for the radio station... Take your copy and stand in front of a mirror, and read it OUT LOUD.. If this embarrasses you, then do it when you are alone.

Nobody needs to see you or hear you, only you. And as your writing improves the mistakes will jump off the page at you... Spell check anything that doesnt sound right or look right, and then read it out loud again... This is also good practice for papers you have to write for class, that may need to be read to the class...

Your confidence will get better the more you write...It's a skill just like anything else.

Also, when you are just starting a new article, take a second to define your relationship to the reader... Is this a fictional work, like a story you want to tell from one friend to another? Or, is it a factual nonfictional work say of an event or a concept?

If you are explaining what you and your friends did as a group together over summer vacation, then referring to youself as 'we' when talking to the reader, may be perfectly acceptable, and make sense. On the other hand, saying 'we' when you are making a statement about what you believe, like you really don't like going to your grandmothers house for holiday dinner, then saying 'we' in that case wouldn't make sense, and make things hard to follow for the reader.

That's just my 2 cents, just keep writing, it's a skill like anything else, keep at it, and never be afraid of criticism.

Whatever doesn't kill you, just makes you stronger.

[K0DXC]

Do they have vanity calls up north or is that a sequential issue?

:D What an interesting callsign.

[K0DXC]

By the way everyone; I just got my final article draft from NCJ. It is going to be put in the Jul/Aug. issue on page 18. If any of you subscribe to the magazine please look at my article. I think you will find it a lot better than the one here on QRZ.

[KI4RVH]

Congratulations on your article and being published!! Keep on doing what you do.

73

Chris

[KI4RVH]

it's a rambling bucket of (poorly written) self-serving nonsense. I don't care if the author is 13 or 113, it's precisely the kind of emotional tripe that does not need encouragement.

Very constructive. I hope you don't work with kids on a regular basis.

Chris

[KI6NNO]

By the way everyone; I just got my final article draft from NCJ. It is going to be put in the Jul/Aug. issue on page 18. If any of you subscribe to the magazine please look at my article. I think you will find it a lot better than the one here on QRZ.

Grats Cal!

[K9STH]

DXC:

Before I get into the details of the writing game I will first list my experiences in publishing:

First of all I sold the very first article that I ever wrote to 73 Magazine (which used to be one of the top magazines in the amateur radio market) when I was 16. Over the years I have had published over 1000 magazine articles and newspaper columns. That is, there are over 1000 copyrights that I hold. I have been the editor and/or publisher of several publications over the years including having been the first FM Editor of CQ Magazine from January 1971 until September 1973.

Frankly, selling your first article (or even having it accepted for publication in a non-paying publication) is often difficult. This is the same for amateur radio publications as well as those for any other market. First of all is the subject itself. Does it appeal to the general readership of the publication to which you are submitting the article?

Next comes your actual "style" of writing. That is just how do you present the material and what level of education is required to understand the material. There is a definite level of education required by most publications. The daily newspapers generally require a 6th grade education to understand the material. This is the same for magazines like People Magazine. Many hobby type magazines (not electronics or computer) require an 8th grade eduction to understand. Most amateur radio and general electronics magazines require a 10th grade education and most computer magazines require a high school diploma. Of course there are exceptions but that is the general scope of things.

Then comes the technical aspects of the article and by this I do NOT mean things like circuit diagrams and so forth. What I do mean is the proper use of grammar, punctuation, sentence structure. Frankly, even if your topic is timely the vast majority of editors just do NOT have the time to go through the article and correct all of the technical mistakes. Now those who edit small circulation publications and who do not have that great of a choice of material sometimes can, and do, take the really messy type of manuscripts and make the necessary corrections to be able to publish the article. I know that when I am publishing something like an organizational newsletter that I sometimes take an article that has potential and completely rewrite it for publication. Of course I do not even mention this and the author usually does not even realize that his/her article has been completely rewritten. Those authors like to believe that they are just "super" writers when, in fact, they had some good material but the presentation just plain "stank"!

Every author has an occasional article refused no matter how successful they have been in the past. Now an established author will often have material that is not quite "up to snuff" purchased by a publication that they have previously written for just to keep the competition from getting the material. Frankly, I have gone back and looked at articles that I have written decades ago that were published and now realize that they are definitely not my "best" work. Good enough to be published, yes. But, I definitely had written considerably better articles.

One thing to consider is to get your English teacher to edit your material before submitting it to a major publication if you are even remotely capable of making gross errors. I believe that the vast majority of English teachers would be very happy to help out. Of course there are those teachers who may not like your particular "style" of writing and by "style I do NOT mean rambling sentences, improper punctuation, spelling mistakes, and so forth. I ran into a professor in college that did not like my "style" of writing and he told me that when I became "published" that I could write any way that I pleased. But, until I was "published" that he would continue to criticize my style. The next class session I brought in several articles that I had published in major magazines. The professor had to apologize to me for criticizing my "style" because I had made a "bit" more money from my writing than he had ever made.

The fact that you are trying to write is to be commended. However, you must realize that just because you wrote the article it does not mean that a major publication is going to print it. Those publications receive many articles every day for consideration and, frankly, they are going to take only the best. Those articles that are substandard (especially in grammar, spelling, punctuation, and so forth) are going to be rejected immediately and it doesn't matter how old (or how young) the author is.

Very few editors have the time to critique your work. They will make a yes/no decision and go onto the next article that has been submitted. It is NOT a realistic request for you to even ask an editor why he/she rejected your articles let alone demand an explanation. By doing so you are only going to improve your chances of being rejected again. As I said before, work with your English teachers to improve your technical aspects and then submit the article to a major publication. If you have all sorts of technical mistakes the chances are extremely good that you will be rejected again and again.

Glen, K9STH

[KC2PBJ]

Incorrect! I offer criticism. IMNSHO, valid criticism. BTW, you spelled my name incorrectly.

Now, let's be more precise. The reason CQ rejected his article is because it's a rambling bucket of (poorly written) self-serving nonsense. I don't care if the author is 13 or 113, it's precisely the kind of emotional tripe that does not need encouragement.

True. It belongs here with all of the self-serving emotional tripe and puffery that is posted. He has made an effort that involves words of more than one syllable and actually attempted a viewpoint. In today's education system, that is a unfortunate rarity. There are very few authors that can escape criticism (valid or otherwise) by a literate audience. "Physician, heal thyself".
Author, edit thyself.

[KA3JLW]

Glen makes good points. I'll add my constructive 2 cents as I too am a professional writer.

Keep to your grade level:
Glen mentions the grade level of the writing. Word has a feature that gives the calculated grade level of your writing sample. I won't give instructions here as Word itself can help you find out how - but trust me, it is revealing and worthwhile to grade your effort. Shoot for about 11th grade and more importantly, understand the variables that change that number.

Remember, Short and Sweet:
Right with that feature is a measure of the number of words per sentence and the sentences per paragraph. One thing that stuck me was the length of some of your paragraphs. Yes, ham radio ops can handle a little more than the average reader, but why make them work for it? Shorten the ideas, cut to the chase, make it more accessible.

Grab them with The Rule of 8s:
Another tip along those lines is the "rule of 8s." Simply put, you have about 8 seconds to grab the reader's attention. If you get it, they'll give you 80 seconds more. And if you still have their attention, you'll get 8 minutes or more - and in-depth understanding.


What does the rule of 8s mean? It means people scan, then drop in and out of an article. Rarely is it read "straight". So how do you win the 8 seconds?

With pictures that have action captions,
With headlines,
With bold and italics, and
With bulleted lists.
I've used all these tricks here. Get out a stopwatch and see what I mean. Understanding the rule of 8s, draw in your readers throughout your writing to make them want more. Because you never know where their eyes might stop and drill down - but it won't be at the first words.

Make a good first impression:
To reiterate Glen's comments: Computers leave no excuse for bad grammar, spelling or even writing. Use your tools, make the editor's job easy, don't leave them open to the risk of ridicule if they publish your article and one of your innocent mistakes makes it through. At the point of finding a spelling error, the reader loses faith in the publication, not the writer - so eliminate risk from the editor's mind as s/he considers choosing your writing. Clean it up, have others review it and check it 9 ways to Sunday. Then submit it, not before.

You are well on your way, I wish you the best and expect I'll be reading many articles from you in the years to come.
Jay KA3JLW

[ab8ro]

True. It belongs here with all of the self-serving emotional tripe and puffery that is posted.

No doubt, there's plenty of that here, too much in fact.

[kb3laz]

No doubt, there's plenty of that here, too much in fact.

Ah so true, look at the reflection in which has been cast.

[ab8ro]

Ah so true, look at the reflection in which has been cast.

Have you sent that to hallmark?

[kb3laz]

Have you sent that to hallmark?

Naw it just came to me so how could I?

[NL7W]

Jay and Glen,

Thank you for taking time to inform, suggest, and encourage. I fully expect "DXC" to make his mark as time passes.

73!

[K0DXC]

Thanks for all the tips and advice everyone. While the article was formatted, it lost its format when I copy and pasted it into the qrz post box from Microsoft word. I will keep the bold and italics in mind for next time though as I didn't use any of those in this article.

My grandpa, K9MMS, is great with english and grammar. He was going to be an english teacher before he decided to stick with EE because of this hobby. In the future I will send things to him for editing.

[N5CE]

Cal,

I enjoyed reading your article. I think it is absolutely fabulous that you got your ticket at such a young age and that you enjoy CW and are so proficient at it. It is great that you are not intimidated by the old guys and are willing to share your thoughts. You write very well. Keep up the great work.

Hope to work you again on CW.

73

Marty

[ab8ro]

Naw it just came to me so how could I?

Well, get on it, you might be able to quit your day job! :D